I was in the process of a lengthy
divorce, and my house had sold in one day.
I was packing when I received notice that personal property appraisers
would be coming through and I was to stop the packing process. This left me in a quandary. I had over 2000 square feet to box up and
move in a very limited amount of time.
I walked
out my back door enjoying the sunshine and wandered my back yard. It was early spring and the bulbs were
peaking up from their hiding places in the soft soil. Their green shoots were
reaching for the sun waiting expectantly to burst into colorful blooms. I was going to miss my home and the beautiful
gardens that I had cared for and created with love. The memories came flooding back. So many wonderful years in this home. I could almost hear the pitter patter of feet
running across the patio, echoing from years gone by.
I walked
past the pond and watched the gold fish that I had never expected to survive
surface, their mouths opening and closing as if to bode me farewell. They
watched me in anticipation of the flakes of food I tossed into the water. So many memories were assaulting me. I gazed at the fruit trees with their buds
barely visible. I thought of the time I
spent picking the berries that grew in rows along the back fence. I remembered the hours of fun our kids and
grandkids had spent in the pool. It was
now green with algae and I wondered if the new owners would know how to care for
it.
It was all
lost now. I walked the brick paths of the little English
garden and I cried. There was both pain
and happiness in my little piece of heaven now. I loved the feel of the rustic fence that was bound by twine. Twigs and sticks were imprinted in my mind as they stood proudly against the backdrop of my garden.
It now was time to move forward towards a new
life I thought as I walked back towards the house. I needed to find myself in the present and
quit looking back to the past. I knew it was
okay to be sad for what was and that wallowing in my recollections for a time,
was okay.
At
this point Seth and I had been seeing each other for a few months. I was becoming anxious. There had been delay after delay. I called and asked him, “How am I going to
pack an entire household and find a new place in a couple of weeks’ time?” It didn’t seem plausible given the time
constraints.
Seth
knocked on my door later that same afternoon.
We sat in my comfortable and colorful living room and Seth suggested
that I should move in with him. To me it seemed the perfect temporary solution
at that time. I was crazy about this man
who had embedded himself into my life.
We molded well and he was both accommodating and loving.
I rented storage units and resumed with my packing. I still had no idea how I was going to get it completed on time. Seth came up with another idea that worked well for me; he suggested that I finish storing what I needed, and turn the rest over to my ex-husband to complete. After all Seth asked me, “Why are you solely responsible?” He had a valid point, and there began my ten years of hell.
I would later see that his thought processes are not
the norm. His logic defied all logic,
and he was hypocrisy at its finest. His
twisted way of thinking knew no bounds and amounted to skewing facts and
circumstance. This has been a wild
ride. Don’t get me wrong, I did
appreciate his suggestion at the time.
My
walk into the flames…
Copyright © 2014
No comments:
Post a Comment
I would love for this to be interactive. I welcome your comments.